Pockets Calls, Anyone?

Posted: May 29, 2013 in Humour
Tags: , , , , , , ,

pocket-dial

Last Friday, I received a call from a contractor I had never met. We discussed a job we would be doing soon on a local restaurant, traded e-mail addresses, and promised to text each other as the job date drew near. It’s a standard way of doing business these days. Nothing I can’t handle.
Before I go on, I need to let you know something about smartphones. They have become the #1 seller in cell phones. You can surf the internet, you can text, use apps, play games, send e-mails, shop, and yes, when the urge takes you, use it to make a phone call. They also have a touchscreen which at times can be a wee bit sensitive. You really have to be careful. Especially when it comes to calls. There is a two word saying which I’m sure will be added to the dictionary soon: pocket calls. These are calls which you inadvertently make while putting your smartphone into your pocket, touching the screen as you do, and thus potentially leading to an embarrassing moment.
So… pocket calls = not always good. As I wound up this phone call, I was walking up the stairs to take a well-deserved shower. It had been a long week, we were going camping, and I needed to wash off the grime of the day. Too tired to bring up my laptop so that I can listen to music, I placed my phone on the toilet tank in case I got a call, got in, and proceeded to wash all 2000 body parts. And I sang. I always do in the shower. It’s a private moment, so why not? The shower is where I practice certain parts of songs I’m having difficulty with, because the acoustics are pretty good. This day, I was trying on some Blue Rodeo. Being alone in the house, I was letting loose. Two songs later, refreshed and clean, I began to dry off, feeling good. I glanced over at my phone to see if I’d received any other messages, and to my horror, it showed that the phone was still on. Had been for over 5 minutes. The number dialed showed this new contractor. Surely, I thought…. he’d hung up? I mean, who would stay on for 5 minutes on an obvious pocket call?
I picked up my phone, and with a meek voice, I asked, ‘H-hello? To which he responded, ‘Was that Blue Rodeo? I love Blue Rodeo!’
OMG.
What do you say at a time like this? Having never met this guy in person, I had no idea what his overall reaction would be. And it’s not that I’m shy….you all know that. But this was akin to being naked in church in the middle of a wedding. Not that I’ve done that, but, well, that’s how it felt.
Deciding to grab the bull by the horns, I asked him if he had call display. He did. There went my excuse that this was someone else singing. So I said the only thing I could think of saying. ‘I was practicing for a thing that we are doing to raise money for this person suffering from this disorder who lost a doohickey.’ It was weak, I know, but in moments of duress, we sometimes clutch at whatever straw that presents itself. He then said ‘Hey, you can really sing!’, to which I responded ‘You should hear Bill!’ He didn’t fall for that one either.
And so now, because of modern technology, I have been pre-introduced to this contractor whom I will physically meet next week. Yay…oh yay. I wonder if I can sue Apple for this?

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