Habitual Creatures

Posted: April 29, 2014 in Humour

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     As I get older, I have come to realize that I have become more of a creature of habit than I would like to admit. After moving so many times in my youth as an Air Force brat, then several more times myself working in various locations in the Arctic, I finally settled down in sturgeon Falls for the last 27 years, and only moving 3 ties in that span. The last location we have lived in for almost 14 years.

      For 14 years, I have developed habits, placing my things in certain places, always hanging my keys on the same hook, putting my wallet on the same shelf, having my meds in a basket on the same section of counter so I don’t forget to take them. My glasses invariably ended up in the same place, the mail ended up on the same shelf to be ignored, the tv remotes in the same nook, and my laptop always on the same table beside Christine, my possessed armchair.

     My wife Anne is, unfortunately, not so much a creature of habit, more of a forgetter. There is not a day that goes by where she doesn’t lose her glasses, keys, purse, shoes, coat, or mind….not necessarily in that order. I suppose in her own way she is a creature of habit.

      My kids, especially my oldest son Alex, are more like I am, and are anchored in life by the knowledge of where their important items are. Our dogs also have habits of their own, always being fed in the same place at the same time, being walked the same way, and pooping where they most loved to poop.

      Life, as they say, was bliss. A place for everything, and everything in its place.

     And so, we moved. Over the last three months, we renovated our new home, and slowly but surely moved our possessions to it. We imagined where everything would end up, and for the most part, everything fit….at least the bigger items. We kind of  forgot where we would be putting the most important things, so aptly named above. And for the first week, it was pandemonium.

     Our first night, I got up in the middle of the night to pee. After walking into the wall a few times, I finally found the hallway, found the toilet, and for the most part, hit the target. Then I stubbed my toes on the way back (twice), and managed to make it to my bed (I think). I lost my keys and ended up taking my wife’s keys, who called me on my phone in a panic because she could only find my keys and thus couldn’t possibly get to town. I drove to town with my spare glasses because I couldn’t find my regular ones (the spare ones would make Elton John proud). I ended up having to come back for my wallet, exchanged keys with Anne(who was laughing at my glasses), and went to the grocery store totally forgetting what I was there for.

     And that was just the first day.

     We changed from satellite to cable, and I am still totally confused about the channels. I managed to find CBC and CTV, out of the 600 or so channels, and have pretty much just stuck to reading my Kindle (my old one….I’m not sure where my new one is). We have all new appliances, and even the microwave is hard to figure out. So we have been eating a lot of salads and such. My clothing is all in different places, consequently I have been wearing a lot of different things that I had not for quite some time….some loose, some tight (very tight), and people are looking at me strangely. Well, more strangely.

     It’s been more than a week now, and we’ve more or less managed to place out things more or less where we remember them now. The dogs have found new places to poop and the kids have staked their claims in the house. And as a bonus, we haven’t killed each other. So we have made new habits, and let me assure you….I am not moving again for a very long time.

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